Know Vs. Feel

So the SAT is tomorrow.

I have been preparing my whole life for this 5 hour test

But I have been studying everyday since February

At least 30 practice questions a night,

hours and hours on Khan Academy,

countless SAT study sessions staying after school,

over 500 flashcards that my English teacher gave me (love you Ms. Tabone!),

poured over a 850+ page textbook,

practice test after practice test after practice test.

I mean what better to do than grammar questions at 2 AM?

I know that I am prepared,

And yet,

I don’t feel prepared.

So I study to convince myself

I take every advantage I can

just so that I can feel safe.

I know that I am a little strange

for spending ten minutes debating what pencils to buy to use on the SAT

(eraser, price, strength, where it was made, pre-sharpened, how it smells)

but I do these things to feel secure.

In my brain,

I know that I am ready,

but I want to feel it in my soul.

So I have 4 new batteries in my calculator,

5 sharpened pencils

and

1 calm heart.

Pixabay/user:lecroitg