Tag Archives: Anxiety

Simple Fear

I sometimes wish

that our fears

stayed as simple

as the monster under the bed

stayed as simple

as the shadow in the corner.

Instead of life choices

and concerns over our nation

and how our future will look five, ten years from now.

But those fears from childhood

only represent the anxieties of adulthood

fear and worry about the unknown and uncontrollable.

But only sometimes do I wish that.

Only sometimes because

I know my God holds history and the future

in the palm of His hand

just like He holds me.


“Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothes? Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? Can any one of you by worrying add a single hour to your life?”

-Matthew 6:25-27

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Thank You, Mr. Anxiety

Why do you attack when I am most vulnerable?

Why do you find all my cracks and pulverize me at those exact spots?

Why do you invade my brain and capture my heart?

I cannot get away from you.

I cannot get away from you Mr. Anxiety.

Too often you consume me.

Too often

But I surround myself with the one who can do all things

I pray

and I can feel Mr. Anxiety slowly shrink away.

I listen to music inspired by you

and their Christian words calm me.

Britt Nicole’s lyrics hit me,

“How many years did You plan this moment here/To show me how You love me”

In my harshest, overwhelming, hurting moments is when you are the most real to me

You are with me all day long

when I walk the halls praying

when I stare out the window at your creation

when I talk about You to my friends

every moment

But my prayers are the most real and vulnerable when I am

The words need to get out

and your wisdom needs to come in

So Mr. Anxiety,

Why do you attack when I am most vulnerable?

Why do you find all my cracks and pulverize me at those exact spots?

Why do you invade my brain and capture my heart?

Thank you

You attack when I am most vulnerable so that God can rescue me

You find all my cracks so that my Almighty Lord can reinforce them

You invade my brain and capture my heart so that my Father can show me his power

Thank you

all you messy emotions for showing me the Prince of Peace’s power.

“How many years did You plan this moment here/To show me how You love me”

 

 

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Pixabay/user:PeteLinforth

Throwing Stars

The world is just too much right now

Too big

Too confusing

Too demanding

Too much

But tears seem like wasted energy

Deep breathes only deflate my lungs

Tingling energy courses through me with no where to go

A heaviness is inside my chest,

a black hole to all of me.

Too many thoughts

Too many thoughts free-flying through my mind

A million ringed circus

I am clinging to a lost hope in the middle of my hurricane of thoughts

The world is shoving throwing stars down my throat

Cutting me

Shattering me

Making me crumble

I have always been a marble statue

So perfectly  imperfectly molded

But the world just

chipped

               chipped

                            chipped

                                        chipped away until the day I crumbled

Dear God

form me back together how you think is best

Use your Almighty hands to hold me up against the wind whipping world

Turn my anxiety into Kintsugi as the Japanese do

Take away the throwing stars

and make them into shooting stars

The kind that make the citizens of your planet

ohhh and ahhhh

The kind that is hoped on, wished on

Dear God

make the throwing stars that are shoved down my throat into

shooting stars that I can hope on, wish on.

Dear God this I pray.

 

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Pixabay/user:Unsplash

Dear God – Calm Me

Dear God,

Thank you for your calming ways. Thank you for always being there for me. Thank you for when I ask you to calm my thoughts, you do.

When my boat is rocking against the storming sea, you calm the sea for me and hold me in your arms. When my hot air balloon is flying away, I call to you and you ground me once more. When the training wheels on my new bike are off, you are always watching me if I fall.

Over the past few months, I never realized how much you are there for me. You are always there. Yeah, I heard the cheesy sayings that God’s phone is never busy and so such, but I never felt it before. You calmed me when nothing else and no one else could.

Directed prayer just to you and not letting anything else interfere has helped me not only as a Christian, but as a person. It makes me undoubtedly sure that Christians are not just talking to themselves when praying, but you are truly there.

Thank you for tucking me in at night and making sure I am safe in my own mind. Never underestimate the power of prayer! 🙂

Philippines 4:6-7 “Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.”

Your calming waves wash over me, thank you God.

With love from your daughter and best friend,

 

praying dear God

Pixabay/waldryano