Becoming Vulnerable ~ Part 2

Once upon a wish,

I wished to become vulnerable.

I am.

***

I got everything I asked for,

down to the little details.

And I can’t handle it.

***

My senses are overwhelmed,

I can feel everything.

***

I begged for this,

I said

No matter the cost,

this is the price I pay.

***

I can’t go backwards,

into unfeeling again.

I’ve realized there is a whole world out there,

to go back?

I couldn’t handle it, just as I can’t handle Feeling Everything right now.

***

I need to get use to Feeling Everything.

What if I can’t?

***

I am torn between

love and worthless survival.

I would love to be able to feel,

to be vulnerable.

Yet my invulnerability would allow me

not to feel all the pain I’m experiencing right now.

But that survival would mean nothing,

because I wouldn’t be living.

***

I learned my invulnerability wasn’t skin deep,

it went to my heart.

I have so many emotions,

I can’t handle it.

All the suffering

and I can’t do enough to make a difference.

And I’m one of the Supers.

***

I wanted pain,

when others have so much,

I am such a hypocrite.

***

Current pain seems to be greater than future pain,

I’ve learned.

***

I choose to become invulnerable,

again.

I choose knowing that my heart

will become stone,

when I’ve felt it be flesh.

***

I choose unfeeling.

I will become invulnerable,

again.

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